No Excuses? Bah!

Have you ever posted a negative comment on a blog site? (I don’t mean a political site, newspaper, or other types of public so-called “blogs”.)

I have done so twice recently. One was in response to a nutritionist-to-be who was using her “personal” blog to shill for food companies. Giving outrageously positive reviews for sugar-laden products without divulging if she had a conflict of interest or mentioning the downside of such products. This is not unlike physicians who promote drugs for Big Pharma on talk circuits (we call them conferences or grand rounds), but at least ethics dictate that doctors reveal any financial or other gains they have tied to any product they discuss.

The other negative comment was in response to an article posted titled “Excusitis” – no doubt meant to be motivating, a tough love approach. Maybe this can be just what some people need – although not many. Who needs to be told to just “do it” unless they are ready to do whatever it is and have plenty of resources to move ahead? I called bullshit on this article (not using that term).

When we pressure ourselves, or worse when others pressure us, to change what does any reasonable, independent thinking adult do? We dig in our heels and become resistant. Admit it. The more you thought about how much you needed to lose X number of pounds, the harder it became to get started. The more you hear about insurance companies threatening to cut off benefits for being too fat, the harder it is to lose weight. You get discouraged. The more airlines that throw fat people off of planes, the angrier you get. The more you see fat men starring in movie roles while emaciated actresses are the ones representing women… Really motivating, uh?

BUT, if we begin to believe that our current behavior(s)  is not leading to some important future goal, we just might become motivated to make a change.

I want to provide an alternative to the “no excuses” mantra for those who are trying to start a behavior change or who are having trouble maintaining one. Because I won’t drag this post on, if you want to read more about motivating yourself  or even help others to get motivated early in the process of change, please follow along in the next post.

gary larson cartoon

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8 thoughts on “No Excuses? Bah!

  1. Great post. Actually, Title 16, Part 255 of the Code of Federal Regulations requires bloggers to reveal whether they’re receiving any compensation (including the items for free) when reviewing products. Sounds like the nutritionist-to-be needs to do a little blogging research before blogging.

    Regarding excuses, good for you on calling B.S. with the tough love approach. If tough love worked, we’d all be exactly where we want to be in our lives. We berate and shame ourselves for not following through on things, but it doesn’t motivate us. There’s much more motivation in self-compassion, kindness, and understanding than in tough love. TL might get through and send a message, but it isn’t a long-term approach to maintaining motivation to act.

  2. Oh, you are so funny. I had to pop over there and read what you wrote on that excuse article. The first thing you wrote is the first thing I thought. What the heck is a metaphysician. Ha ha. I laughed out loud. I guess we think alike.

  3. I’ve never posted a negative comment – if someones views are different from mine I just shake my head and move on.

    And so far, in 2 1/2 years and 40,000 + comments left on my blog – the ONLY negative comment I’ve gotten was that I use too many exclamation points – but dammit, I love using them and its my blog!!! 😀

    • I love !!!! In fact in my editing, I have to look carefully for them!

      40k comments! Holy cow! (I’ve had that much spam picked up by WordPress, LOL)

  4. I’ve not posted a negative comment, not intentionally anyway. 🙂

    As for ‘just do it’, I think that’s a good step in the process, but it’s not the first step. First, you have to identify what IT is–that thing (or those things) that you will do consistently and THEN you just do it. But that’s still too simplistic, because IT changes from time to time and rarely with any sort of warning. Then it’s back to step 0ne again.

  5. Thank you so much for your encouraging comment today on my blog. I especially appreciate the reminder to celebrate and reward the small successes. I need to work on that.

    How fascinating to read this post (and I read the article to which you were referring). I can see that you make several excellent points. I am one of those that DO find that article motivating. But I suspect it all depends upon where in our journeys we are… and how we interpret and respond to the message.

    And as one who has been the “target” of several months of what another blogger called “tough love”… nope, I do NOT find being called out or mocked or sliced and diced on a blog to be motivating. It was very hurtful, but mostly due to the attitude that came along with the message.

    I call this kind of message, no excuses, a “me” message. It is one that *I* can apply to myself, to say go get ’em, Loretta, you can do it. But it backfires for me when someone ELSE pounds me over the head with it, especially when it is done judgmentally, letting me know how much I have fallen short.

    On my blog I have a little sign in the sidebar that says: No Excuses.
    And truly, for me, when I stopped making them, or when I catch myself making them even now, it helped me to get honest with myself. And to assume responsibility, and that encouraged me that I COULD change. It was very empowering!

    But I would never bludgeon someone else over the head with it. If they are ready, or find it motivating, they will take it for themselves. If it doesn’t fit their personality, then they would leave it.

    Sorry to be so longwinded… you really got me a-thinking. 🙂 I will try to be more careful not to come off as cramming it down others throats of it’s not their thing, or they aren’t ready or motivated by it. That would be the last thing I’d ever want to do, to hurt someone’s journey.

    Thanks for some good food for thought. I do appreciate it.
    Loretta
    =^..^=

    • Thanks Loretta for the personal reminder that “No Excuses” can be very helpful for those who working hard on their health plan.

      I am so oppositional that “no excuses” only works for me if it comes from within.
      🙂

      Sent you an e-mail

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